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About the Project

"Stuck in them 20 somethings, stuck in them 20 somethings
Good luck on them 20 somethings, good luck on them 20 somethings
But God bless these 20 somethings"– SZA


Live to Tell: Return to Saturn is a compilation, an offering, and a cipher of lessons learned. I'm turning 30 years old at the end of July 2017. I am, by no means, an expert on being in your 20s, but I am the head writer of my narrative. I've learned a lot about to how to navigate that which has consistently challenged me these past ten years, and I appreciate the journey I've been on that has allowed me evaluate important parts of my life. I've lifted and taken on different parts like multi-faceted jewels and rocks with question marks on each side, answering each one gradually. Some sides were mirrored, and marked fractions of my life that I needed to examine: friendships, romantic relationships, education, building community, identity, living out of my comfort zone, family, spirituality, letting go, grieving, politics, feminism, and career(s). I had to learn and affirm, again and again, who I was, what I wanted, and what my purpose was. I am still learning. I am coming into and stepping into womanhood. 


Saturn Return comes from horoscopes and astrology, which is when the planet Saturn returns to the same place in the sky where it was when a person was born. I think that's lived poetry. I think it's a time that marks growth, womanhood, and welcoming in a new chapter and start in my life. I've been with other sisters and friends who've lived to tell me about their return, their struggles, and their personal growth that comes with age, acceptance, time, and community. 

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Also, I don't really want anything for my birthday. I'm opting for the narrative of giving things (stories) away for my birthday.


I wanted to honor my thirty years by writing about thirty moments, art pieces, books, and thirty photos that have served me. Some will stay in the twenties (where they belong, haha), and some will help me fill in the rooms that will house my thirties. Every year before my birthday, I go to an Angel Card reader to help guide me in my next year of life. This year, she encouraged me to really celebrate and really reflect on what memories and lessons I'll take with me, and which ones I'll leave behind. 

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What you'll see in the Portfolio and its captions is not at all a comprehensive list of everything and every person and every story I hold close to me. Like, no. Not at all. From this project, that I pulled together in about five to six days, I used what I could find online, in my personal archives, and what's been on my mind. I've included poetry, old journal and blog entries, and I'm shouting out some of the folks, books, voices, and organizations that have helped me build myself from what feels like the ground up.

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[If you are viewing this from a cell phone, the captions may not show up for you. You may need to view the site in an Internet browser (not on an app, like Facebook), and then click on the plus (+) sign at the bottom right corner. The story is the best part! If that doesn't work, make sure to read this on your laptop or computer at some point.]

photo by Anjelica Jardiel

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